Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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