you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
Randomize
