We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
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