Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
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