i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Randomize
