why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
Last time Jon threw a party I woke up on my porch, no shirt but 4 bras on, and "make better life choices" written on my stomach in sharpie
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
Apparently the cops had to handcuff me in order to get me to come with to the hospital with them. They asked me if I had had any experience with handcuffs before and I replied, "Only in bed." What a life
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
Randomize
