that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
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