i'm signing you up for texting rehab
you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
Randomize
