I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
you realize that if you hadn't mouthed "we're getting laid tonight", i wouldn't have woken up with your ex this morning. just sayin
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
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