we were pretty classy up until the second keg
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Randomize
