I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
Randomize
