I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
Segways are the fanny packs of transportation. Useful in some situations, but you always look like a tool when using one.
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Randomize
