So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
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