Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
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