so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
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