I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
it's like heaven, but drunker
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
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