I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
Is a Chipotle burrito an acceptable "sorry I ran over your cat" gift?
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
Randomize
