But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
He stopped me mid-blow job to say that his new year's resolution was to stop hooking up. MID FUCKING BLOW JOB.
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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