Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
Randomize
