Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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