genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
Randomize
