you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
Just thought of the perfect gift for mom.... how about not telling her about my fourth open intoxicant ticket I got last night?
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
Randomize
