Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
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