physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Randomize