3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
