Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Randomize
