Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
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