okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
Randomize
