...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
I am full of burrito and curiosity
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize