it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
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