hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Randomize
