it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'
wtf?
It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'
Note to all middle aged "I totally let myself go after childbirth" frumpy mothers: I do not dress this way for your husbands. Stop looking at me like that. It's not my fault.
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
