So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
No more Irish car bombs ever.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
She stripped naked and ran around the outside of the house while I stood by the tent holding her clothes shouting "come back" because I was too drunk to chase her. This is why we can't have nice things.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
