I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
I would fuck him just for his dog
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
