Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
