GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
I was THIS CLOSE. But drunk me wanted to play those washboard abs with a spoon, like an actual washboard. Apparently that hurts, so I just squished it out at home alone.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
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