McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
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