Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
Randomize
