we should wear snuggies to the strip club
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
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