It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
Apparently oprah and I were in competition to see who's ass could get bigger this summer
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
Woke up naked on a bed full of money, doughnuts, and keys that weren't mine. Unsent dick pick on phone, and cheap cigar butt on my pillow. Also...I maybe hotwired my car.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
Go christen that room with your naked body.
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
Randomize