garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
I kiss like a newly born barfing kangaroo
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
Randomize
