So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
Randomize
