I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
Randomize
