Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
Randomize
