why didn't you poke me back
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Randomize
