it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
Randomize
