I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
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