Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
Randomize
