I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
it was like his penis was on wheels.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
Randomize
