Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
Randomize
