white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
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