How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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